Humorous Jokes and Funny Stories about Children - 1

Children

A youngster was looking at the family photo album and asked his mother, ''Who's the slim young man on the beach with you with lots of muscles and curly hair?'' ''That's your father.'' ''Then who's the old bald-headed fat man that lives with us now?

Children

How do you get your children to take a bath?
Tell them it's practice for the pool. The next day how do you get them out of the pool?
Throw in a bar of soap!

Children

Children's answers People go about Venice in gorgonzolas. The Tropic of Cancer is a rare and dangerous disease. An executive is the man who puts murderers to death. A tantrum is a bicycle for a man and his wife.

Children

A father took his young son to the opera for the first time. The conductor started waving the baton, and the soprano began her aria. The boy watched everything intently and finally asked: ''Why is he hitting her with his stick?'' ''He's not hitting her,'' answered the father with a chuckle. ''Well, then,'' asked the boy, ''why is she screaming?''